Grief Does Not Keep Time

        Grief does not keep time. Grief may lessen over time but it has no timeline as to when you will be relieved of your grief. I know something about grief. Grief hit my home when I was 8 years old and my favorite uncle died of cancer. It hit again at 12 when my grandpa died of heart disease. It hit again when I was 15 when my brother died in a car accident. It hit again when I was 19 and my grandma died of complications from diabetes. It hit again when both my dad’s parents died when I was 24. It hit again when I was 30 and my aunt died of lung cancer. Those are just a few examples of the people who have passed. There are many more. That’s a lot of deep hurt to deal with in my short 40 years of life.

However, Jesus brings light to the deepest hurt of our lives. He is the only one who can relieve us of our grief. It is he who brings peace that surpasses all understanding. Jesus has given me peace. There is a small residue of grief left over with  my brother but the rest of the deaths no longer grip me with grief. God released me of my grief over my brother in 2013. I was finally ready to let go of the death that had such a prolonged grip on me. I miss my family that has passed but I know one day I will see them again for with Christ it is goodbye for now but not forever.

Let’s consider the following scripture:

Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort: who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

God is there to comfort us in our grief. Why does he do it? Because of his great love and mercy for us, but also so we can comfort those who are grieving.

Can I bring some comfort to you from my experience? Don’t be hard on yourself. Grieve how you grieve. It’s ok to yell, cry, be angry, be numb, it’s ok to feel joy, it’s ok to let go of the grief. It’s ok to live your life and move on. Your loved one would not want you to punish yourself. Let go of the guilt. Whatever way you grieve go ahead and grieve. For those who are comforting those who are grieving just listen. Just hold their hand and sit in silence with them if that’s what they need. Be there for them. I know when my brother passed I lost a lot of friends. I’m not sure why. I think because they thought death was contagious. That if it happened to me it could happen to them. I just think they didn’t know what to say. So I encourage you be there for your loved one who’s grieving. Your presence will make a difference in their lives.

Those of you that are still grieving over your loss I encourage you to write a letter to your loved one telling them all you want to say. The last thing I would’ve said to each would be I love you and I’m sorry I didn’t appreciate you more. I miss you. I can’t wait to see you in heaven.

What’s one thing you want your loved one to know?

What’s the last thing you would have said?

I’m here. I’m listening.

Genuinely Yours,

Amy Z