There's Freedom in Dreams

I have a dream. My dream is that one day I will be completely free from my past. I dream that one day I will be completely free of fear, anxiety, doubt and worry. I believe there is freedom in dreams. I believe that when we think of our dreams it stirs hope in our hearts. I’m so thankful that with Christ our dreams can become a reality. It is only with Christ that we can live a fulfilled life. I’m so grateful that I gave my heart to Christ. I didn’t give my heart to Christ because I wanted something from him. I gave my heart to Christ because I finally understood that I was a sinner. I finally knew that I needed a savior. When I gave my heart to Christ I just fully understood how much I needed him. My walk with Christ has been such a blessing. Layer by layer my past has come off my hardened heart. Christ is still working on this heart of mine. I know that he always will but I believe eventually he will no longer need to pull back the layers of my past. I believe that together we can live in the present.

I dream of the present. I can almost feel a cold breeze touching my skin helping me to live in the moment. I believe there is freedom in living in the moment. Right now I feel free because I’m in the moment with you dear reader. I’m pouring my heart out to you hoping that something that you read here will touch your heart, and help you change for the better if you need to. I’m free when I write because I’m living in the moment. I love living in the moment, but I’m still working on how to do that. I can’t spend every day and every second writing.

So I need to know, how do you live in the moment?

What’s your dream?

What gives you hope?

Let’s try our best today, right now, to live in this moment, together.

Genuinely Yours,

Amy Z

The Living Word is a Matter of the Heart

           Why is the living word a matter of the heart and not just a matter of words on paper in a book called the Bible? Because the word is alive and well. Jesus is the word and he breathes life on dry bones. How many of you feel thirsty in a dry land? How many of you know there’s something more out there even though you feel like you’re just missing it? Jesus is just a breath away dear reader. Call on him and he will be there in whatever circumstance you face. When I faced suicidal thoughts and despair Jesus plucked me out of the situation and helped me every step of the way. I went from my mind and heart being broken to being free from all that despair. I am now thriving at life. I spent a lot of my life just surviving day by day. Now I’m thriving in a career that I love that has benefits and retirement. I plan to retire from my career one day. I didn’t think I could thrive and it didn’t happen overnight. It happened one step at a time and one choice at a time. I chose life again and again. Sometimes I stumbled but Jesus was always right there to help me get to the next step. It’s like I was on shaky ground before, especially in my mind, but Jesus didn’t leave me the way he found me.

So too is he there for you, dear reader. He is looking to you to call out to him. He will reach down his hand and pull you out of your despair little by little until you look back at how far you’ve come and there will be a great chasm between you and who you used to be.

I feel like a whole new person. I love what my friend said. She said she compares me to who I used to be a year ago and that Amy is nowhere to be found. She doesn’t compare me to others, she compares me to who I used to be. It is a marvel to behold who I used to be compared with who I am now. I’m far better off now than I was a year ago. I’m getting stronger day by day and getting closer to the woman God called me to be.

If someone tried to convince me that Jesus wasn’t real I wouldn’t believe them. It’s not a matter of just the Bible. It’s a matter of the heart. I’ve seen Jesus at work in my heart and my life. I have changed from who I was. I still have challenges that I have to face. I am human after all. I struggle with anxiety, but God is helping me day by day to get through it. I have less anxiety now than I did before. I just believe that if I keep putting one foot in front of the other something good will be on the other side. It has to be. There has to be a brighter day, a better tomorrow. I believe a change of heart is coming my way because of my love for Jesus. The struggles that I face are real but I am never to face those struggles alone. Jesus is always with me. I love him so much and I’m so grateful that he’s been by my side in so many ways.

What about you, dear reader? Are you struggling to find meaning in what you’re going through? Jesus may not provide all the answers but he does embrace you with love, grace, and mercy. The living word is not a matter of the mind it’s a matter of the heart. Don’t worry if you don’t have all the answers, you can turn to the one who does. Are you struggling to believe that Jesus is real? Do you struggle with believing Jesus is there for you just like he’s there for me? What challenges are you facing today? You don’t have to say a big long drawn out prayer. You can just say Jesus, help me and he will. What is the condition of your heart in this moment? Are you feeling worn out or in despair? Just say help me, Jesus. He’s there truly. I’ve seen him at work in my life and I’ve seen him at work in the lives of others too.

What’s your matter of the heart?

Who are you longing to be?

Where do you long to be?

Are you in a situation that feels hopeless?

It’s not.

Hope is hand in hand with Jesus waiting for you to reach out and call on him.

Genuinely Yours,

Amy Z

Hard Won Victories

       A friend of mine said something that sparked a blog in me. She said victories are hard things aren’t they? It rang so true for me. Victories are so hard. I've had quite a few victories in my life, I feel like the victories I've achieved lately have been some of the hardest things. So many of the things I’ve been working on are things I've been struggling with for years, like getting new glasses. or going to the dentist. These have been some hard won victories that have been a long time coming. But I think the hardest thing about victories is it takes a lot of perseverance and so often we want things right now and most things in our lives don't come right away, but a little bit at a time. I think we can appreciate them even more that way.  Sometimes in the victory there are set backs and we stumble and fall. The most important thing is to not let it keep us down for long. Don’t give up. It's so important to get back up and keep striving forward.

      I know there is a huge breakthrough on the other side of all this hard work I've been doing. I know anxiety is not the end of my story. I know my story ends with me, anxiety free helping hundreds of women and maybe men to come to being set free from their anxiety or their struggles. But man is it hard to remember that when I'm in the midst of it. Yes, victories are hard things but so worth the endurance it takes to get there. I so want things to be easy, simple and comfortable. Sometimes we have moments like that but my friend said this life is a test of our character and God tests our character to prepare us for what comes next. Sometimes God makes us uncomfortable so we will make a change. I know so many things I wouldn't have changed if I had remained comfortable with them. There's something that burns within me to keep trying no matter how hard it is, no matter how many times I've failed, No matter how much I just want to give up sometimes I just keep trying and I hope I never lose that striving for something better. Striving to be better. Striving to be free from the burdens I am no longer able to bear.

      Let’s look at a victory in the bible. Let’s take a look at David and Goliath. I’m not going to include the scripture here because most people know the story of David and Goliath. So check out 1 Samuel 17 to read the story; it’s a good one.

      It wasn’t easy for David. First he had to ignore his brother who said David had an evil heart. Then he had to convince King Saul that he could face Goliath because he had faith that God would deliver them. Then he had to throw off the armor that the king put on him and take the weapon of his choice to the battle. It was a small thing that won him his victory and a mighty God. Also, it took courage for David to face Goliath and he faced him with faith in God. He even stated that God would deliver Goliath into his hand. David’s victory came as no surprise to David and it came not as others expected it would. They expected him to face Goliath with armor and a sword and he came at him with a sling and a stone. David’s victory came according to his personality, his faith, his strength and his God on his side. David couldn’t have had the victory by being some else he had to be himself. So often I think I need to be like someone else to be victorious but God gave me the personality, the strength, and the faith to tackle the challenges in my own way. Thank God that he gave us these things to battle challenges that we will face. Thank God we can be ourselves.

      Victories are hard things but worthy things. It’s not easy for me to get out of bed some mornings. For over a year I hit the snooze button every morning to get just a little more sleep. All it did was leave me lying in bed anxious about my day and what was to come. Grant it some days were fine but what I began to realize was the snooze button was unhealthy for me. It was unhealthy for my mental health. So for 53 days I’ve not hit the snooze button. I’ve had my setbacks and boy some mornings it’s hard to get out of bed, but this is a victory for me. 

Some victories come from small beginnings. 

Each victory begins with one step at a time and one choice at a time.

What’s your small step?

What’s your victory?

Genuinely Yours,

Amy Z.