Dear reader, I went to a prayer meeting at my church. We pray
for one hour over various issues. I almost didn’t go. I was driving home from
work and I thought well I’m hungry or I’m tired. Then I realized I wasn’t
really tired or hungry. I believe God reminded me that this prayer meeting was
just what I’ve been looking for. I’ve wanted to fellowship with my fellow
brothers and sisters in Christ. I’ve been craving fellowship and there’s the
opportunity for a little bit of fellowship, so I went.
During the closing prayer we were all standing in a circle
and Pastor Paul said if anyone needs prayer come to the center of the circle.
He also said if we felt led to pray for people in the circle to do so. I had no
intention of going in the circle even though I struggle with anxiety. But then
Pastor Paul said there’s a stirring of the waters and if you want a double dose
of the Holy Spirit come forward. It reminded me of the pool of Bethesda in John
chapter 5 where there was a pool that was stirred by an angel.
Now there is at Jerusalem by the
sheep market a pool, which is called in the Hebrew tongue Bethesda, having five
porches. In these lay a great multitude of
impotent folk, of blind, halt, withered, waiting for the moving of the water. For an angel went down at a
certain season into the pool, and troubled the water: whosoever then first
after the troubling of the water stepped in was made whole of whatsoever
disease he had. John 5:2-4
After hearing Pastor Paul say
there was a stirring in the waters I didn’t hesitate I went forward. Several
people prayed for me and part of the prayer was me letting go, which of course
meant letting go of the anxiety and I did; I said I did.
On the way home I thought, step
out of the pool of Bethesda. I thought to myself how am I going to lead a
healed life. Part of it is walking out your healing. You get healed but that
first step out of the pool takes courage and you have to walk out this life
called a healed life. If I say I’m healed what’s stopping me from getting out
of the pool? The word says:
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our
iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we
are healed. Isaiah 53:5
I
already have healing because Christ is who he says he is.
So
when I have anxiety I overeat, I am an emotional eater. So after the prayer
meeting I was going to go to del taco and order 2 carnitas burritos with extra
cheese out of habit even though one burrito fills me up and I wasn’t anxious. I
thought to myself if I was healed at the prayer meeting what does living a
healed life look like? Dear reader, I don’t really know much about a healed
from anxiety life, but I do know I need to step out of the pool of Bethesda and
move toward my healing one step at a time, one choice at a time.
I didn’t go to del taco.
I didn’t overeat.
Victory.
One step at a time.
One choice at a time.
Genuinely Yours,
Amy Z
