Tug of War: Growth or Fear

             My life coach asked me a profound question today. Is my desire to grow greater than my fear of the unknown. I’d love for my answer to be yes. However, my answer is no. Right now my fear is winning out. I hate to admit it dear reader because I want to be strong and say when you follow Christ your struggles are over. That’s simply not true and frankly a detriment to our walk with Christ. We will always be a work in progress but we can take heart for he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion just as his word says:

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ: Philippians 1:6 KJV

So I so want to be the strong version of myself the one who believes God will do great things with my life. Instead I am weak and I’m reaching out to God less and less succumbing to my old habit of staying in bed until the last possible second. I’m awake. I’m just lying there. I’m not even saying to myself Amy you should get out of bed I’m just lying there waiting for the alarm to go off. I can relate to the apostle Paul for he said:

 I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. Romans 7:15 NLT

 I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. ²² I love God’s law with all my heart. ²³ But there is another power^[b] within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. ²⁴ Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? ²⁵ Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin. Romans 7:21-25 NLT

Through the struggle this scripture shows us who will rescue us, Jesus. In chapter 8 of Romans following the above scripture it says there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1) So don’t despair dear reader if you find yourself in this tug of war between sin and the spirit for Jesus wins out. You don’t have to be a slave to sin any more. You can walk by the spirit. So again I say don’t despair dear reader if we would be still before the Lord he will speak and show us what to do next. So where do you find yourself today? Are you struggling? Lean into Christ. Give him your burdens for his word says:

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 NLT

Are you feeling joyful? Praise God so no matter what state you’re in praise God. Praise him in the storm and praise him in the sunshine.

I will be filled with joy because of you. I will sing praises to your name, O Most High. Psalm 9:2

So I just encourage you today to find a friend who will encourage and strengthen you and shoulder your struggle. It is when we are at our weakest that we need Christ most and what better way to feel Christ in our lives than to be surrounded by the love of our friends? Believe me I have to stop trying to do this getting out of bed thing on my own and lean into Christ but also put plans into place that help me succeed my goal. I also encourage you to pray for God to help you. I haven’t even asked God to help me get out of bed. How foolish! The Holy Spirit lives in me and will help me even in something as simple as getting out of bed.

So where do you find yourself today dear reader?

Will you share it with me?

I’m here.

I’m listening.

Genuinely Yours,

Amy Z